almost ten weeks

This week, you will grow really fast. This is according to a book by Professor Stuart Campbell, "Watch Me Grow!" The book is full of 3D baby pictures inside the womb, taken by 3D ultrasound scan. So, your father and I can roughly imagine what you look like every week inside the womb.

In the ninth week, your look is already resembled a baby. Your back is straightened and your neck is formed. Your tail (yes, you had a tail once!) will start to disappear and your arms and legs grow longer with an amazing speed. You start having a nose too. From your crown till your butt, you are measured about 22-30mm.

Then in the tenth week, you grow longer, now your length from head to butt increased to 31-42mm. Your brain develops very fast so your head looks much bigger now compared to your other body parts. Your eyes and nose can be seen clearly, but your eyelids are still stuck and will not be opened till a few months later. Twenty little teeth-to-be start to form inside your gum. Your fingers are formed too. And your legs measured about 2.5mm.

Your nerves can now receive signals and most of your internal organ has started to function. Your heart has reached its final form and beats 140 times a minute. Your lungs, stomach, and intestines are still growing. The kidneys start to move to its final position too.

Pregnancy is a miracle, I'd say. A journey together with the Creator to make a new human being inside my own body. Your growth fascinates me and your father. And the understanding that every single human being is made this way, remind us of how special each and everyone of us is. Dearest child, we love you.

For now, I could not feel your presence yet, I could only feel the indicators like the waves of nausea. You are already moving around inside me now, it's just that you are still too small for me to notice the movement. I could not wait to feel your moves and your kicks, darling.

It's an hour past noon now, and raining softly outside. I'm going to have my lunch now. *hugs*

three hearts beating

When I lie down on the bed yesterday, I thought about us.

There are three hearts beating on this bed now, instead of the usual two.

And I felt love serenaded me to sleep, beside my husband, and holding my dear baby tightly in my womb.

the first nine weeks

Dearest Wowy,

Our counting was based on LMP (Last Menstruation Period) count. So the nine weeks started on the first day of my last menstrual period, that was 18 September 2005. You was not created until about the third week. I feel the need to explain this because we just got married for about seven weeks. You were made straight away. I think you are our wedding gift from our dear God.

We found out about your existence on Sunday, 23 October 2005, after a day of nausea and two test packs. We confirmed it once again the next morning with another test pack. We've told your grandparents and aunties right away, though. They were surprised and excited, but not as surprised and excited as both of us, of course! Your three youngest aunties have started kissing my tummy everytime I was going to leave from their home. And they constantly send their love over sms and phone too, until now! I'm sure they are going to be more excited once my tummy started to grow bigger and bigger and bigger.

Monday, 31 October 2005 was our first check up. We waited for an hour for the doctor even though we were the first patients. We spent the waiting time chatting about you and about pregnant mothers around us. Then the doctor came, apparently he had just delivered a baby upstairs. We gave him short introduction about us and about you and the doc asked me to be scanned. The doctor congratulated us the first time he saw the ultrasound scan monitor, "Yes, this is definitely pregnant and we had it in line with your information". We went out beaming proudly. This was our first time being a parent-to-be, so you can imagine the excitement.

Your father had a "lebaran" holiday from Monday, 31 October, all the way to Wednesday, 9 November. And I fell sick with runny nose and slight fever during that holiday. Both sets of your grandparents and aunties came for a whole day to help your father taking care of me. Your father was very sweet and caring throughout, and I am very thankful having him as a husband. Everyone, including me, was worried about you when I was sick. I really hope it did not affect you in any negative way, dear.

The end of your seventh week was spent in your mother-side grandparents' house, we stayed a night there because your youngest aunt had her 17th birthday on the next day, Monday, 14 November. It was our first time spending a night in our parents' house after the wedding. We had a birthday cake, "tumpeng", and noodles for the birthday.

Tuesday, 15 November, we went to another doctor for our second check up. The doctor gave us our first parent's fright when he spent about five minutes starring intently at the monitor during the ultrasound scan, while typing something on the keyboard and turning the handheld scan gadget over and over my tummy. Your father and I was shooting worried looks a few times during that long five minutes. Then suddenly, the doctor exclaimed, "Good! We even have the heartbeat now!" Apparently he was taking his time to measure your CRL (Crown Rump Length) and your heartbeat. You were 1.5cm in CRL and had a heartbeat of 165bpm (beat per minute). He said everything was fine and you were in your eight week.

So that makes this week, your ninth week. I am getting better in handling the nausea, but still can't eat as well as before pregnant. Everyone said it was totally normal. Some people even lose a few kilos during the first trimester. I lost one kilogram when I weighed last week at the doctor's. I'm still staying at home and happily entertain myself surfing and writing, while learning to cook.

Oh, and these two days, I noticed that my tummy is getting bigger! I did not have a flat tummy to start with, so your grandmother said that it was normal for me to get bigger now. I just wished I could have a flatter tummy (compared to before pregnant) after you are born later. Haha.

Okay, so that was your first nine weeks.

week nine

I started to write to the unborn child. Over the time, I will grow older and will somehow change. I just thought it could be fun for my child to know me when I am this young and rather carefree. I hope I have the patience and diligence to keep on writing.

These few days I had difficulties in eating again. I just don't feel like eating, but if I don't eat, I feel terribly hungry. And no, even though I am hungry, the food doesn't taste better. I think it's the nausea... or more likely it's because I can't cook well.

This afternoon, my junior high school friend just came and we had a long chat. How fast time has passed since then! She's one of my closest friend and we have lost touch for about 8 years when I moved to a far away village. She told me that our friends were surprised that I was getting married because I was such a bookworm last time! Oh well, bookworm can find love too, don't you think?

Currently, I am making wall-calendar to make counting-till-the-baby-comes easier. Nowadays, I'll do all kind of activities that does not involved household chores. *sigh* And my mind continues to scream warning about me being a lousy mom when the baby comes if I don't change my attitude towards the chores. :P

Big Lizard in the Cupboard

I was going to take a plate in the cupboard above the sink when the big ugly lizard ran across the cupboard wall behind the plate. I was in shock. I hate lizard. I especially hate big ugly lizard (and small black uglier lizard). This cupboard above the sink has no bottom cover, it is the temporary storage for the after-washed-dishes. It has no shelves, but has plastic racks for the plates and glasses instead, so the excess water can drip straight to the sink. We move the dishes into their respective cupboards after they get dry.

This disgusting lizard found its way inside that cupboard and had a disgusting big watery poo. Lucky no plates or glasses were harmed in the process... or it could disgust me even more. I fought my fear and made loud noises to shoo the lizard out of the kitchen. Then while trying very hard not to vomit, I cleaned up the mess that ugly bad lizard left.

I hate lizards to the point of wondering why our dear God made them.

Lizard aside, this sink underneath the cupboard has a unique attitude. If I use it for a long time to wash a lot of things, slowly the drained water can come out from the bottom pipe and flood the floor. That happens if I kept all the dirty glasses, plates, pans, pots, spoons, forks, whatever, since morning and only wash them at night. If I wash the things after every meals, nothing happens. That is a really good way to make me diligent in washing after meals!

First Letter

Dearest Wowy,

Okay, you might be wondering about the name. It is a name your father gave you when we just found out about you growing in my womb. Wowy, from WOW, because you just surprises us. This name will only be used strictly to call you while you are still inside... and inside these letters I'm writing while you are still inside.

You are growing into your ninth week and we still don't know your gender yet. We're still searching for THE name you will be called with for the rest of your life. Let's just hope you love the name we gave you.

This is the first letter, but I will write about your previous eight week. I will give you all the letters written for you during the pregnancy or during your childhood as a gift on your birthdays when you are much older. I hope these letters from the past, written by your younger mother, will enrich your life in some ways.

I am about 24 years and four months old now. Still adjusting myself in being a wife (your father and I just married in less than two months!), and I am still completely clueless in being a mother. When you are reading this now, I hope I have been a good mom for you, and a good wife to your father.

It's 12:34am now and I really need to sleep. My body is not only mine now, but yours as well. We love you.

week eight

We went to another doctor for another check up last night. I was feeling sick during the car ride there, I had to lie down and forced myself to sleep. The nausea is getting worse nowadays. I could not wait till the end of the first trimester!

At the doctor, another ultrasound scan was performed. But this time, I could not see the monitor! It was facing the other way. Luckily, the doctor printed the images.

We had our first scare as parents. The first doctor that we saw smiled and congratulated us the first second he looked at the USG monitor. This doctor, he took about five whole minutes playing with the keyboard, while looking seriously at the monitor and turning the ultrasound handheld gadget over my tummy. Hubby and I were glancing at each other occasionally shooting puzzled looks. He was afraid that the fetus was not growing properly, or even gone.

In that worrying silence, suddenly the doctor said firmly, "Good! We even have the heartbeat." Apparently, he was taking his time to measure the fetus size and the heartbeat rate.

Now Wowy is about 1.5cm in length and have 165bpm of heart rate.

Mother Material

Today I was glued to the laptop for the whole afternoon and forgot to cook lunch. If the hungry hubby did not complain, we would eat lunch very late. And I should have taken care of myself better than that! I’m not eating for myself alone now.

Anyway, the whole incident made think about being a mother and being responsible to another human being. I am not cut out to be a mother. Not good in doing house stuff, cook terribly, forgetful, ignorant, and definitely not a caring person in continuous mode. I could be a caring person, but not all the time.

It is indeed a time to learn now. I have about eight months to make myself a good mother.

Home Alone 2

Finally, I had ADSL internet connection at home. Yay! I have spent several hours emailing and surfing about baby stuff. The connection was not constant, though. Sometimes up, sometimes down for no apparent reason. The Telkom guy can only check the connection on Monday. I’m not complaining, though. This was the best connection I had in months (not counting the time I was in Singapore, of course!).

I told my friend over email that I was lazy doing housework and she replied straight away that Wowy must be a boy. That was deduced from the fact that I was lazy to put on make up, more carelessly dressed, and lazy to do all the housework (such as cleaning). My mom and sisters thought that way too. *sigh* I guess I have looked a lot worse than before. Anyway, this baby is either a boy or a very lazy girl. ;)

Home Alone

Hubby went to work for the first time after a long ‘Lebaran’ break. I stayed at home this time.

Last week, I was down with flu and slight fever. The most uncomfortable illness I’ve ever felt. Due to the pregnancy, I was reluctant to take any medicine, so the recovery was only by lots of water, vitamin C, and bed rest. Slow recovery, but I was happy I made it.

During those awful times, both of our family came over to help with the cleaning of the house, preparing of foods, and taking care of me. We were blessed to have them.
I just hope that this illness have no negative effect on Wowy’s growth.

morning sickness

I still experience morning sickness throughout the day and during the night. Could not eat as well and as much as I used to. Hoping the nausea to go away as soon as possible.