visit to the pediatrician

Third Hepatitis B vaccination today. Jove is 9.5 kg, 69 cm, no lag in physical development, and healthy. The pediatrician joked that people could break their back just by carrying my baby. He also wondered if his needle could enter the chubby thigh.

As always, Jove is the only baby exclusively breastfed among the babies in the waiting room. This far, after about seven visits to the pediatrician, several meetings with mothers at the shopping malls, parks, or restaurants, I've only met two other mother who gave exclusive breastmilk to their babies.

A rainbow for mom

On our way to my parents’ house this morning, we saw that beautiful seven-colored arc on the sky. The rising sun spread his pale gold rays through the soft clouds in the east and the sky was painted with lumps of golden clouds in the pale blue background. Rain drizzled softly on our side.

I told my husband, this was God’s birthday gift for our wonderful mom.

Happy birthday, Mama.

God’s miracle

Jove just had his first blended-boiled-potato-carrot meal; I put him down in the middle of the bed then left the room to clear up the potato-carrot stained dishes and high chair. Three minutes later, when I entered the room, the bed was empty. No baby on the bed.

No baby on the bed!

I was frozen for a split second, too scared to move. Horrible images played in my head.

When I left him, Jove was playing with his multi-colored cow in the middle of the bed, barricaded by four adult-sized bolster and pillows on each side of the bed, plus one body-mate (170cm bolster) at one side. Now, one of the bolster was missing (the one at the far side of the bed) and there was no baby.

If the baby fell down, knocked the cold hard floor or the hard wood of the bed frame, he should have cried. My baby’s cry could be heard from blocks away, I should have heard it from the living room. If he did not cry or make any sound, could he have fainted?

I ran to find him.

I found the baby lying on his tummy, with his chest and hands on the bolster, looking around at his new surrounding. He loves to look around, especially in new places. It was his first time on the floor between the bed and his crib, he had fun. I called his name and he looked up at me, and to my relief, smiled.

I quickly took him and hugged him tight, then remembering something, sat him down to check for bruises or open wounds or scratches, well, any sign of injury.

I found none.

Then I tickled him. He laughed his belly laugh. I laughed along, nervously. We played peek-a-boo and I tickled him again. His laughter quickly washed my fears away.

I thank my Lord. For I could not understand how could he went from the bed to the floor safely. He could not even crawl or sit up by himself yet. He could have shifted from the middle of the bed to the side… but to go down to the floor safely to the position I found him in, impossible, at least from my frail human mind’s point of view.

Maybe He taught my son how to fly down safely when He saw him on the verge of falling down.

I learned my lesson and renewed my faith.

One day, Lord please show me the event. I’m really curious on how he got there.

sneaky mom busted

The little guy wailed. He has tried to go to sleep for almost an hour to no avail. Frustrated, he sought the Ultimate Way to Sleep, latching on my breast.

I nursed him for a few minutes, and then I took a magazine and read. The little guy sensed that I was doing something else when I flipped a page. He turned, looked at the magazine, looked at me, then continued sucking.

After a while, the rhythm of the sucking became slower, and slower, and slower, then stopped altogether. I took a pacifier and quietly replaced my nipple with it.

He shifted. I stroked his head, patted his tiny butt, hoped he would settle back to sleep. No, he didn’t.

He dropped the pacifier. Opened his eyes big, looked at me in the eye for a few seconds, then his eyes started brimming with tears. He wailed as if I have betrayed his trust by taking out my nipple and shoving a pacifier in. The sneaky mom felt a pang of guilt instantly. You couldn’t helped feeling very guilty with that sad innocent tear streaked face looking at you like that.

When I placed the tip of my breast back into his mouth, he didn’t suck at it quickly as he always did. He looked at me with his teary eyes while slowly latching to my breast, then he stopped latching and while looking at me, wailed again. I said sorry a few times, kissed and hugged him, promised that this time I would wait until he let go by himself. Only then he stopped looking at me, started latching and happily nursing while drifting to sleep.

Never underestimate a six-month old baby.

a christmas blessing

Grandma was on her bed when we got there, smiling. We rushed in and took turns showering her and grandpa with kisses. It felt so good to finally see them again, especially now. Little Jove, surprisingly cheerful after a 12-hour journey, laughed a lot and delighted the great grandparents. A wonderful Christmas day we had.

The next four days were spent remembering and creating warm memories with dearest grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles. Wishing we can have more of those moments this year.

puncak old and new

We spent the old and new in Puncak, a cool mountain-side resort town in Bogor, near Jakarta. Stayed in the private villa of my father-in-law's youngest brother.

Colorful flowers, clean cold air, fresh green vegetables, a lot of food, yummy fruits, and 180 degree view of spectacular fireworks filled our two days and a night stay there.

end of a holiday, a new year

The rain is falling softly outside. My baby and husband are sleeping soundly next to me. It's almost two a.m. and I should have been sleeping. I couldn't.

We just went back from our string of trips (that started on Christmas day) and I have not done my quiet time for this New Year. So here I am in the cold wee hours of the morning, tip-tapping on the notebook.

New Year always brings new hope for me to be a better person. My husband deserves a better wife and my son needs a better mom. Those would be the top priorities for my New Year's resolutions.

Lord, be with me as I walk through this year. Please hold me close and never let me go. I need you.